Lunch

I've always tried to provide a healthy diet for Char, especially at daycare/preschool, but I've been redoubling my efforts since she started the new preschool. New beginnings, right? Anyway, I've taken some pictures of this week's lunches so far, as it might help inspire others. Keep in mind, Char is a vegetarian but eats dairy and eggs. I typically aim for one fruit, one veggie, one grain (preferably but not always whole grain), and one non-dairy protein (sometimes the protein is just dairy though). I also usually send a cup of milk but sent juice one day.


This one is for tomorrow, Mexican style. A star-shaped quesadilla, black beans, star fruit, and homemade guacamole in a heart-shaped silicone muffin cup.


Another heart-shaped muffin cup (it's the only silicone thing I have so far and I find I like to send 4 things typically, not 3), this time with dried peas, a half-sandwich with a moon-shaped cutout (the sandwich was cream cheese with strawberry slices shaped like hearts), soup (quinoa and spinach and potato), and raisins with cheese cut with veggie cutter into star shapes.


VERY veggie pasta salad (veggie pasta, the kind that's like 1 serving of veggies per 1/2 cup), broccoli and peas and carrots with a dressing of spinach artichoke dip and mayo, cottage cheese with grape tomatoes, and 2 crackers plus some peaches in heart-shaped silicone cups.

This one was actually for President's Day. A star-shaped sandwich of pumpkin seed butter and jelly, star fruit, and "red white and blue" salad of grape tomatoes, mozzarella cheese and a few blueberries with some basil and vinegar and water dressing.

This was the fun activity of last night turned lunch for tomorrow. I cut tofu into thin slices and then used a cookie cutter to make 2 hearts and a fish shape, and we colored them with food coloring and sprinkles. Also spinach pizza on whole wheat Naan bread, green beans with garlic, and a plum.

It's Okay to be the Parent AND the Friend

I think I've been trying to write this Blog entry for at least a couple of months now, but I haven't been able to find the words. I know it was brewing even before the hubbub about the man who taped himself shooting his daughter's laptop and then posted it on her Facebook wall in response to her writing some things that were very disrespectful of her parents, but that event certainly got my mind churning even more on the topic. I know I read the words "the problem with parents today is they want to be their kids' friends, not their parents" over and over in the aftermath. I even read that on the dad's own Facebook wall a couple of days after his video went viral.

The thing is, that phrase really bothers me. I have been having trouble putting into words the reason why, but I found this Blog entry that explains it far more succinctly than I ever could. To me, friends are people who know you in good times and bad and care about you no matter what. Sounds like a parent fits the bill there perfectly. A friend is someone who appreciates your unique qualities. Sounds like a GOOD parent to me ;).

In a way, I think one thing that was missing from my parents' parenting of me WAS friendship and respect. Oh, I was obedient, but only because I was terrified of letting my parents down, not because I respected the rules. I certainly did things that were varying degrees of "bad" when I was reasonably assured I wouldn't get caught. But I always felt as if I would be loved less not only for disobeying, but for thinking differently. Every comment I made about how I felt about something was cut off, and I was told why I should feel a different way, or should have acted a different way, or why I was wrong and the other person was right. Every comment I made was a chance to give some sage advice, thereby dismissing whatever I was going through. I think a little more acceptance and true friendship would have been a good thing. And I vow to at least TRY to listen with less judgment and give less awesome advice than my gut reaction would dictate.

Oh, and on the man who shot the laptop? I don't really judge him. It was within his rights to do it as he provided the laptop, and as a minor his daughter doesn't technically "own" anything. His weapon was very close to the laptop so obviously he wasn't in danger of accidentally hurting nearby traffic or neighbors or anything like that. He was doing what he thought was right, and I can respect that (even if IMO he did react just as immaturely as his daughter's original Facebook rant). I haven't parented a teen yet and I don't know what I would do if really motivated and ALL my buttons were pushed. And while I'm a little less strict than a lot of parents, I really do think I balance "kind and firm" pretty well. I don't let my kiddo get away with murder; I just handle her discipline positively, with regard to the person she'll become rather than the current disobedient behaviors. But I really don't think it's such a bad thing to be a friend AND a parent. In fact, I think the problem with parents today is there aren't enough who are willing to be a friend AND a parent. Too many want to be just one or the other.

Montessori School - Take 2

Today was Char's first day at the private Montessori school near where I work. There were enough small issues with the daycare that we decided to move her when the school director called to tell me that they were opening their new classroom (they are brand new). Char now calls this school the "bank bank school" because it looks like a bank. Still kinda sorta holding hope for the public Montessori come fall, but we'll see. At least if she does begin then she will have some experience with the Montessori method.



The very first thing her new teacher told me is, "She is VERY independent!" Haha, no kidding. She said she's one of the most independent 2 1/2 year olds she's seen enter the program, and she's been teaching 30 years. And if anything that independence grew today: She was insistent on doing EVERYTHING herself tonight, from buckling herself into the car seat to getting me a cooking pot and filling it with water to running her own bathwater. Oy! Let's hope this continues :).

More light table fun - and an update

I've been keeping up my promise to "try" to do more activities in the evening rather than just watch tv. I haven't so much been keeping up with my promise to chronicle it on this blog, largely because the activities we're doing aren't all new things. We've done some more balloons in the bathtub, some more sensory table work, and LOTS of light table fun.

Tonight we colored salt and then played with it on the table. I just put salt and a few drops of food coloring in a baggy and we shook shook shook it up until we had some blue, some green, and some yellow colored salts. I then put them in three clear food containers and set up the (as my favorite blog would say) "invitation).

It was really pretty fun. We drew some letters and she attempted to trace them, and she just generally had fun rubbing the salt on the table and mixing the colors.

________________________________

And an update: Monday night we went to an information session with a local adoption agency to learn more about their domestic adoption program. We left both very happy with this agency, and we're getting the vital documents together and filling out the application. This may actually happen! I'll be honest: I'm a little bit scared out of my mind, but also very, very excited. I can only hope that our next child is as wonderful as Charlotte!

First Impressions

Charlotte has started doing impressions of people. I think the first one was of one of her daycare teachers, Miss Lucy: "I'm Miss Lucy, and I don't know what this is. What is this?" She has also done Carmen (from Spy Kids... yes, seriously), her grandmother, her aunt, a giant, and a few other people both real and imagined. Her lip does something funny and her voice gets exaggerated and kind of deep and then she starts.

Here's one of her being her Aunt Kandi:

The transcript: "I'm Aunt Kandi! Come over here and give me a hug." And then it degenerates into something about breaking her knee and her elbow lol; she doesn't have a long attention span for much of anything, and long car rides don't help. We were on our way back from a family weekend 4 hours from home, which I'm sure I'll write some more about soon. Please forgive the very weird video quality; I discovered as I was recording that I must have smeared a little ranch from Char's snack on my cell phone camera lens part.

I wiped it off and got this one of Charlotte pretending to be a giant who's going to eat me:

Starting Over?

Look around. If you have a calendar on your wall, glance in its direction. Does it have 4 very large numbers on it? Perhaps 2-0-1-2? That's because it is now the year 2012! Seriously, it really is!

The new year was the time frame Alan and I gave each other to start talking about adopting again. If I'm being honest, I hadn't hoped it would come to this point. I know it's wrong, but that doesn't stop me from wishing that Charlotte's birthparents would have another baby; if they did, the state would step in and, theoretically, we would get the call to foster and eventually adopt the baby. And since Charlotte is INCREDIBLE, soooooooo much of the unknowns would be... less unknown. And less scary.

BUT it didn't happen that way. And Charlotte turns 3 this year and we turn 37. Which is OLD, dammit! Twenty years ago, you know, more than half my life ago (!!!!!), I really believed I would have my first child LONG before I was 30, if not be done having kids by then. At the very latest, I wanted to be done having kids by 35. I also felt like I was meant to have a lot of kids, and there was NO WAY I was going to have an only child. Well, tell the universe your plans and it laughs in your face. In my case, the universe spit on my plans.

At some point, I have to feel done. And honestly I'm getting closer to the point of being okay with the idea of "one and done". I'm not saying I'm there, but I don't think it would feel like a tragedy. It would have been tragic to me to live without kids at all, but having an only child is less tragic and more mildly disappointing.

Anyway, Alan and I are starting to research domestic adoption. Foster adoption was so difficult with the state that we don't really want to go that way again (unless a biological sibling of Charlotte's does pop up), and international adoption has never really felt right to us. So we're investigating domestic adoption. Back before the state approved us, when we briefly looked into DA, I felt drawn to either private adoption with an attorney or Catholic Charities. As luck would have it, Catholic Charities has an info session on the 23rd. If I remember correctly from 3 years ago, they only accept a certain number of potential adopters into their pool at a time and let them get matched with birthparents and adopt babies until there are only a few couples left before they add people. So (since I know their fees are reasonable, they are very ethical, and we should qualify) the big question will be when can we expect to be in the program and ready to be shown to expectant parents?

Internally, I need a limit. And I think that limit is 2012. If we can start the process in 2012, and by start the process, I mean start the homestudy (which should only take a few months for a private adoption, at most) and be ready to be shown to birthparents within or shortly after 2012, then I feel like I want to start down the road. If there's a 2 year wait to get in the program, though, I feel like this may not be the path for us, and perhaps we'll have a meeting with an adoption attorney in the area (who charges $250/hour to meet with her even the first time, so we'll definitely wait until after the Catholic Charities info session).

But... I'm still holding out hope of a phone call... (Can the easy thing EVER happen for us?)

Balloon Mania

Aside from some cutting, pasting, and tracing (which, by the way, is a TOTAL FAIL at this stage, the tracing part anyway), the only new fun activity to note happened tonight in the bath. We'll call them "sensory balloons" (once again stolen from playathomemom3.blogspot.com, best blog ever). Tonight we used 4 balloons: one filled with hot water, one filled with cold water, one filled with green food coloring water, and one filled with yellow food coloring water. Thank goodness I didn't overdo the dye!

I think I will definitely do this again someday soon, only maybe put small items in the balloons if I can manage. Perhaps a letter-shaped sponge, or some jingle bells, or if I'm very brave, some water beads; I just have to make sure I get them all out so none go down the drain. Thankfully somewhere I have a fish net :).

Here are some of the PG-13 pics. Sorry the quality is poor; I didn't feel comfortable bringing the good camera into the bathroom, so husband took them with his phone:
(Seriously, how stinking cute is this???)

I had to do the first one, and it was pretty cool!

I just held the others in place.