Gotta say, it's weird to get back in the groove of actually feeding the baby when she's hungry (theoretically anyway) and not feeding her when she's not hungry. It's a GOOD thing, ultimately, if it works, but it's really not going to be a fun transition.
D has been eating about 36-40 oz of formula per day. i know with this girl that if she doesn't get her nutrients during the day, she'll wake multiple times to eat. Usually every 2 hours after an initial maybe 4 hour period of wakefulness (when, of course, i'm not sleepy yet lol). Previously she was getting around 30, maybe 32 oz per day before bedtime, and waking one or often two times per night. Now i fear it will be much less during the day and more at night.
Yesterday was better than i would have thought. Daycare could only feed her 3.25 ounces per bottle (2 different bottles), but i was able to give her a full 5 oz bottle and a 6 oz one before bedtime. She woke 3 times, but one was early and i wasn't asleep yet (just *almost* asleep), so that wasn't SO bad. She was super clingy and fussy last night though.
Today, Alan gave her a 5 oz bottle in the morning and daycare fed her a 5.5 oz bottle and two 4.5 oz bottles. Unfortunately so far i could only give her a 3 oz bottle. So even if she takes like 6 oz before bed, she'll only be at 28 or 29 oz for the day, which means at least two wakings tonight, again probably 3. It's just so depressing, you know? Knowing that you're back to waking constantly like you did with a newborn. If i could breastfeed i would definitely be cosleeping at this point. And, yes, tonight she's being super fussy and clingy again. i love this kid so much i certainly don't mind, but i don't know how to really entertain her or soothe her when she just wants to be held but needs more stimulation than me singing or talking and playing with her toys.
Oh, and i know it's crazy, but i can tell she's already lost weight. i hope this transition works, dammit! LOL
Edited to say this absolutely sucks. She will only eat 3 oz for me. It seems that one of us is destined to cry during a bottle. (The good news there is i DID get my thyroid meds refilled, but still, this bites. Like, a lot. She's had 25.5 oz today. Guess when she'll make up the other 12-15? Yeah, when i should be sleeping. Only i have to go to work tomorrow and can't take an extra-long nap there like she can. Farts McGuillecutty.)
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Monday, November 16, 2009
Feeding Therapy
We had a feeding evaluation with a food therapist today. i'd love to say it went great, but i have to admit that i have some amount of skepticism. Basically D has had so much food aversion and we've been reacting so much to it that we've started feeding her very frequently, smaller amounts of food at a time. And this is bad.
We were instructed to let her get hungry, really hungry, between feedings, in the hopes that she eats bigger bottles. We hope, hope, hope that it works, but my pessimistic side predicts that we will end up feeding her 5 ounce bottles (if she even takes that much at a time) every 3 hours round-the-clock (except at night she'll probably only eat 3 oz before falling back to sleep; if only it were so easy for the adults in the family lol). In other words, back to a newborn feeding schedule, but with larger amounts obviously.
And somehow i'm supposed to fit in two solids feedings a day when she's hungry. Ummmm... i did ask her whom we're supposed to call in the middle of the night when we've already been awakened 3 times, and she just brushed me off. i wasn't kidding. Sigh. (i sincerely hope i'm wrong).
P.S. It might be worth mentioning that i'm feeling a bit negative because i've missed a few thyroid pills... or a few more than a few. And i have to wait for the doctor to refill, which she probably won't without a blood test, and i don't have the time off available at work, and it just sucks. OK, i'm done.
We were instructed to let her get hungry, really hungry, between feedings, in the hopes that she eats bigger bottles. We hope, hope, hope that it works, but my pessimistic side predicts that we will end up feeding her 5 ounce bottles (if she even takes that much at a time) every 3 hours round-the-clock (except at night she'll probably only eat 3 oz before falling back to sleep; if only it were so easy for the adults in the family lol). In other words, back to a newborn feeding schedule, but with larger amounts obviously.
And somehow i'm supposed to fit in two solids feedings a day when she's hungry. Ummmm... i did ask her whom we're supposed to call in the middle of the night when we've already been awakened 3 times, and she just brushed me off. i wasn't kidding. Sigh. (i sincerely hope i'm wrong).
P.S. It might be worth mentioning that i'm feeling a bit negative because i've missed a few thyroid pills... or a few more than a few. And i have to wait for the doctor to refill, which she probably won't without a blood test, and i don't have the time off available at work, and it just sucks. OK, i'm done.
Friday, November 13, 2009
This day can suck it
i was supposed to go to the doctor's appointment today with Alan and D. Originally it was scheduled for 1:30, so i took 1/2 day off to be there. Then yesterday (i think; could have been Wednesday), the doctor's office called and asked to push it back to 12:00. 12:00 is not a great time. To get 1/2 day in, i have to work until 11:30, and it's 45 minutes from work to the doctor. Plus Alan has to be at work at 1:00, so he couldn't really do a 12:00 appointment alone, but we decided that since we'd really like to get her diagnosed and treated sooner rather than later, we went with it. And yes, we know that the doctor is just trying to leave early and are not amused.
So i got to work an hour early this morning just to make sure i got a full 1/2 day in (and i had a lot to get done). Around 9:30, the doctor called to change the time of the appointment again, this time to 11:15. The doctor apparently had a very important tee time, er, meeting. This made it easier for Alan to go, but harder for me to, since i'd have to leave work at 10:30 to make it and i had way too much to get done, would have to come back in, blah blah.
So we decided to keep the appointment and Alan would go without me, and this would free up 1/2 day vacation for me to go to the Food Therapy appointment on Monday (it never ends!). The doctor, naturally, was running late and didn't actually enter the exam room until 11:55. Grumble grumble grumble. Which put Alan in a rush because he would have to drive all the way back past our house to drop her off at daycare and then back almost to the same place by 1:00, 1:15 at the latest. Yeah.
So they did the scope procedure, putting a tube down D's nose, and Alan says she did really well, just fussing a little bit. They did, indeed, confirm that D has Laryngomalacia, or soft larynx. Alan told me hours later (after the doctor was on the golf course, i'm sure) that they asked him if she's ever turned blue. So now i'm entirely freaked out that this could cause her to stop breathing! They say it's not that bad, probably won't need surgery, etc. But still, not exactly a good thing to hear without the ability to ask follow-up questions. Eeep!
The afternoon, otherwise, was okay, but i ended up having to stay late. Which is normally fine, but i got there early, so that's no fun. And of course the doctor's appointment put D behind on her food thing, so here i am, waiting for her to wake from her nap so i can stuff as much food down her gullet as possible.
Aaaaannnddd, when i got home, one of the dogs had peed on the carpet, for the first time in years. Little snot!
But, there is cake. Oh, yes, there is cake.
So i got to work an hour early this morning just to make sure i got a full 1/2 day in (and i had a lot to get done). Around 9:30, the doctor called to change the time of the appointment again, this time to 11:15. The doctor apparently had a very important tee time, er, meeting. This made it easier for Alan to go, but harder for me to, since i'd have to leave work at 10:30 to make it and i had way too much to get done, would have to come back in, blah blah.
So we decided to keep the appointment and Alan would go without me, and this would free up 1/2 day vacation for me to go to the Food Therapy appointment on Monday (it never ends!). The doctor, naturally, was running late and didn't actually enter the exam room until 11:55. Grumble grumble grumble. Which put Alan in a rush because he would have to drive all the way back past our house to drop her off at daycare and then back almost to the same place by 1:00, 1:15 at the latest. Yeah.
So they did the scope procedure, putting a tube down D's nose, and Alan says she did really well, just fussing a little bit. They did, indeed, confirm that D has Laryngomalacia, or soft larynx. Alan told me hours later (after the doctor was on the golf course, i'm sure) that they asked him if she's ever turned blue. So now i'm entirely freaked out that this could cause her to stop breathing! They say it's not that bad, probably won't need surgery, etc. But still, not exactly a good thing to hear without the ability to ask follow-up questions. Eeep!
The afternoon, otherwise, was okay, but i ended up having to stay late. Which is normally fine, but i got there early, so that's no fun. And of course the doctor's appointment put D behind on her food thing, so here i am, waiting for her to wake from her nap so i can stuff as much food down her gullet as possible.
Aaaaannnddd, when i got home, one of the dogs had peed on the carpet, for the first time in years. Little snot!
But, there is cake. Oh, yes, there is cake.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
i just can't stop hugging this kid!
She's just so squeezable!
Yesterday was Alan's and my third anniversary! Yay! We celebrated with some cake that i made on my gift -- my new range with cooktop and double oven! This is my anni and Christmas gift all rolled into one, and man do i love it! It heats sooooo fast and cooks evenly and i can bake 2 things at once if i want to! Neaner neaner neaner.
The last few days D has been eating more again, and that's a welcome change. Either it's an early growth spurt or we're seeing some benefit from the meds. They keep saying that reflux peaks about now, so hopefully this will last through the hump. It seems that every time the meds help, it gets worse a couple of weeks later, but i'm trying to stay optimistic. At any rate, we have an ENT appointment tomorrow about the probable laryngomalacia. Wish us luck!
Yesterday was Alan's and my third anniversary! Yay! We celebrated with some cake that i made on my gift -- my new range with cooktop and double oven! This is my anni and Christmas gift all rolled into one, and man do i love it! It heats sooooo fast and cooks evenly and i can bake 2 things at once if i want to! Neaner neaner neaner.
The last few days D has been eating more again, and that's a welcome change. Either it's an early growth spurt or we're seeing some benefit from the meds. They keep saying that reflux peaks about now, so hopefully this will last through the hump. It seems that every time the meds help, it gets worse a couple of weeks later, but i'm trying to stay optimistic. At any rate, we have an ENT appointment tomorrow about the probable laryngomalacia. Wish us luck!
Monday, November 9, 2009
Supposedly D looks just like me
i've heard this said before, but i've never heard it quite so, i don't know, adamantly, i guess.
i mean, it's true that her hair is currently roughly the same color (not light enough to be blonde, not dark enough to be brown, and while there are some red highlights, not red enough to be red either). Her eyes are definitely bluer and a couple shades darker than mine, but they're still in the same color family anyway. And i suppose we both have round faces. She certainly looks MORE like me than like my dark brown haired, medium brown eyed, long-faced gorgeous husband, but she doesn't exactly look like me. Normally when i hear this, DH is right by me, and i think people must just think she looks like me because she doesn't look like him.
But Saturday we all took one of the dogs to Petsmart for vaccinations. (Something i hate but it was expeditious and we had to have updates for DCS with short notice.) Alan took Jessie into the exam room, and i wore D around the store facing out in the mei tai.
As we were looking at the parakeets, one of the dog food representatives came up and said, "Aw, she looks just like you." i just said, "Thank you." But she kept going, saying she doesn't normally see babies who look so much like their moms. Um... So i said, "Really? Because we're adopting her. She's our foster daughter." She couldn't believe that!
(And then she commented about D putting her lip out, right before D started crying and i had to take her over to a bench near the vet area and feed her and then wear her in-facing for a nap.)
i mean, it's true that her hair is currently roughly the same color (not light enough to be blonde, not dark enough to be brown, and while there are some red highlights, not red enough to be red either). Her eyes are definitely bluer and a couple shades darker than mine, but they're still in the same color family anyway. And i suppose we both have round faces. She certainly looks MORE like me than like my dark brown haired, medium brown eyed, long-faced gorgeous husband, but she doesn't exactly look like me. Normally when i hear this, DH is right by me, and i think people must just think she looks like me because she doesn't look like him.
But Saturday we all took one of the dogs to Petsmart for vaccinations. (Something i hate but it was expeditious and we had to have updates for DCS with short notice.) Alan took Jessie into the exam room, and i wore D around the store facing out in the mei tai.
As we were looking at the parakeets, one of the dog food representatives came up and said, "Aw, she looks just like you." i just said, "Thank you." But she kept going, saying she doesn't normally see babies who look so much like their moms. Um... So i said, "Really? Because we're adopting her. She's our foster daughter." She couldn't believe that!
(And then she commented about D putting her lip out, right before D started crying and i had to take her over to a bench near the vet area and feed her and then wear her in-facing for a nap.)
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Every time i go to type a post title
It comes out something like "Just another update." Can you say BO-ring?
Anyway, we had a foster care review board meeting on Tuesday to go over the status of the case. The only thing that really should have happened is for the petition for termination of parental rights to have been filed. The magistrate had said way back on July 31 that the state had until October 15 to file. Guess what... no file yet. The case worker turned it in to Legal on Oct 7, bu Legal never filed. They're going to reconvene the review board on December 1. Sigh.
The food aversion is just getting worse and worse. i called the doc today and hope to hear soon.
As far as my health problems, i'm still trying to figure out the insurance. Alan's insurance for 2010 will SUCK if he wants out of network coverage, which it will have to be for my surgery. My company's option is actually better, but it could cost $6500 for the out-of-pocket maximums for both in and out of network. The insurance guy from work is going to try to talk to the insurance company but i'm not really that confient. We'll see... sigh.
Anyway, we had a foster care review board meeting on Tuesday to go over the status of the case. The only thing that really should have happened is for the petition for termination of parental rights to have been filed. The magistrate had said way back on July 31 that the state had until October 15 to file. Guess what... no file yet. The case worker turned it in to Legal on Oct 7, bu Legal never filed. They're going to reconvene the review board on December 1. Sigh.
The food aversion is just getting worse and worse. i called the doc today and hope to hear soon.
As far as my health problems, i'm still trying to figure out the insurance. Alan's insurance for 2010 will SUCK if he wants out of network coverage, which it will have to be for my surgery. My company's option is actually better, but it could cost $6500 for the out-of-pocket maximums for both in and out of network. The insurance guy from work is going to try to talk to the insurance company but i'm not really that confient. We'll see... sigh.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Some more updates on the reflux
D had a pediatric gastroenterologist appointment on Tuesday. We had some paperwork issues that set us back about an hour (because we're foster parents -- ugh!), but otherwise it went fine. The GI ordered a LOT of new stuff to happen:
* A swallow study - this is another barium X-ray deal but studies her throat and upper esophagus, not her lower esophagus, stomach, and small intestines like before. This will be tomorrow.
* A food therapy appointment. No, not psychotherapy, more like physical therapy. Supposedly the therapists work "magic" to get the kids over their food aversion issues. And her food aversion issues are getting TERRIBLE! We used to feed on demand until she stopped demanding. Now it's so bad that we have to really push her to eat even a little bit at a time. One day at daycare this week she at 3.75 ounces the entire day! So we very much look forward to that, but it's about 2 1/2 weeks away.
* A referral to an ENT. She thinks the squeaking is not tracheomalacia, but laryngomalacia. They're very similar. In tracheomalacia, the trachea is "soft" and collapses on inhale. In laryngomalacia, it's the larynx instead. In order to diagnose, they'll have to do a nasal scope, so we're trying to prepare ourselves for this lol.
* And meds: She increased the dosage of Zantac slightly from 1.8 mL 2x daily to 1.9 mL 2x daily. She also increased the dosage of Prevacid from 1x daily to 2x daily, but we're still waiting for that to really start helping. It took 3 weeks for Prevacid to help the first time, but hopefully it won't take that long this time.
Say it with me, folks: Reflux sucks! It even rhymes! Seriously, the food aversion problems are the pits. The poor kid physically pushes the bottle away, turns her head, fusses, cries, even screams. It feels like we're force feeding her sometimes! But the doctors say we're doing the right thing and to keep it up. She's certainly gaining weight anyway! She is up almost to 14 pounds, which is near the 50th percentile for her age, which is awesome considering she used to be <5%.
Developmentally she's still doing great. She's a master unassisted sitter, and has started going from sitting to a belly crawl (on purpose). Yes, she's belly crawling. Like, a few feet at a time, to chase a toy. She's mobile! i am so not ready for a mobile baby! Thankfully she's also very, very slow right now lol.
* A swallow study - this is another barium X-ray deal but studies her throat and upper esophagus, not her lower esophagus, stomach, and small intestines like before. This will be tomorrow.
* A food therapy appointment. No, not psychotherapy, more like physical therapy. Supposedly the therapists work "magic" to get the kids over their food aversion issues. And her food aversion issues are getting TERRIBLE! We used to feed on demand until she stopped demanding. Now it's so bad that we have to really push her to eat even a little bit at a time. One day at daycare this week she at 3.75 ounces the entire day! So we very much look forward to that, but it's about 2 1/2 weeks away.
* A referral to an ENT. She thinks the squeaking is not tracheomalacia, but laryngomalacia. They're very similar. In tracheomalacia, the trachea is "soft" and collapses on inhale. In laryngomalacia, it's the larynx instead. In order to diagnose, they'll have to do a nasal scope, so we're trying to prepare ourselves for this lol.
* And meds: She increased the dosage of Zantac slightly from 1.8 mL 2x daily to 1.9 mL 2x daily. She also increased the dosage of Prevacid from 1x daily to 2x daily, but we're still waiting for that to really start helping. It took 3 weeks for Prevacid to help the first time, but hopefully it won't take that long this time.
Say it with me, folks: Reflux sucks! It even rhymes! Seriously, the food aversion problems are the pits. The poor kid physically pushes the bottle away, turns her head, fusses, cries, even screams. It feels like we're force feeding her sometimes! But the doctors say we're doing the right thing and to keep it up. She's certainly gaining weight anyway! She is up almost to 14 pounds, which is near the 50th percentile for her age, which is awesome considering she used to be <5%.
Developmentally she's still doing great. She's a master unassisted sitter, and has started going from sitting to a belly crawl (on purpose). Yes, she's belly crawling. Like, a few feet at a time, to chase a toy. She's mobile! i am so not ready for a mobile baby! Thankfully she's also very, very slow right now lol.
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