They called me back today. This is the LAPEX expert in Atlanta. LAPEX is what they call Laparoscopic Excision of Endometriosis, which is a more specialized type of laparoscopic surgery than what is more common (and what i've had 2 of), which is laser ablation. In laser ablation, they use a laser to burn the endo, which sometimes just touches the surface of the endo, leaving the disease's deeper implants in place (and thus often leaving the symptoms in place). In LAPEX, they use the laser as a cutting instrument to actually cut the endo OUT of the body. The chances of needing further surgeries are greatly reduced versus ablation surgery.
i've decided i definitely want to pursue LAPEX. If the surgeon gets inside and can't fix it all or at least fix the bilateral hydrosalpinx issue, then they can do a hysterectomy at that time. The CEC does a free records review of previous medical records. i'll have to get all the papers from the doctors and send it to them for review. It takes about a week, and then the doctors themselves give you a call.
The problem remains: They are out of network. They did say the hospital and anesthesiologist are almost always in network, and only their fees are OON. But even so, i can imagine they charge $10k, $20k, maybe even $50k. i think the surgeon bill alone on my ACL reconstruction (major knee surgery) was $24k, which was thankfully in network. So i can guess these guys charge at least that. i forget what out of network is for us, but i believe the insurance pays 70% of out of network charges. Which could mean pretty much every penny we have saved up for IVF. Which means by the time i got to do IVF, i would be 35 and the success rates would take a huge dive. :(
Have i mentioned that all this sucks donkey balls? Just checking.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Not getting any better today
Sigh. So this morning i decided to call the endo expert in Chattanooga, Dr. Liu. Guess what? Dr. Liu is retiring, and sold his practice. He only sees patients once a month and only accepts cash. Must be nice to be THAT good at what you do that you don't have to play by the "rules". Unfortunately this means that my options are even more limited.
So then i called my insurance company to determine if the doctors at the Center for Endo Care in Atlanta are in-network or not. Nope. They do, however, do records reviews for free, so i left a message with them in hopes that they'll look at my surgery files and make a recommendation.
i still have a big, big problem, though. i'm not doing IVF with a bilateral hydrosalpinx (25ish% success rate), and if i go to an out-of-network surgeon, i won't be able to afford out-of-pocket IVF any time in the next, oh, century. Not to mention adoption if it still doesn't work out. Oh.My.Gosh. i feel like the bottom fell out of my heart.
So then i called my insurance company to determine if the doctors at the Center for Endo Care in Atlanta are in-network or not. Nope. They do, however, do records reviews for free, so i left a message with them in hopes that they'll look at my surgery files and make a recommendation.
i still have a big, big problem, though. i'm not doing IVF with a bilateral hydrosalpinx (25ish% success rate), and if i go to an out-of-network surgeon, i won't be able to afford out-of-pocket IVF any time in the next, oh, century. Not to mention adoption if it still doesn't work out. Oh.My.Gosh. i feel like the bottom fell out of my heart.
Monday, May 18, 2009
Days like today
make me want to just curl up and die.
So i'm in a ton of pain from the endo. Thank you, evil migraine-inducing birth control pills, for absofreakinglutely NOTHING. So i called my OB/GYN to ask her if i should have an HSG because the RE last week thought he saw a hydrosalpinx on sonogram, and to ask if i should take the pills some more. Answer about the pills: Maybe. Answer about the HSG: No, but it's never that simple, is it?
The bottom line is this:
So i'm in a ton of pain from the endo. Thank you, evil migraine-inducing birth control pills, for absofreakinglutely NOTHING. So i called my OB/GYN to ask her if i should have an HSG because the RE last week thought he saw a hydrosalpinx on sonogram, and to ask if i should take the pills some more. Answer about the pills: Maybe. Answer about the HSG: No, but it's never that simple, is it?
The bottom line is this:
- i'm pursuing IVF because it's my only way of conceiving, and if i conceive, it will perhaps postpone or eliminate the need for major (open) surgery (hysterectomy).
- i have bilateral hydrosalpinx, which given my particularly bad case of endo, cannot be fixed without major surgery.
- If i have ivf with the bilateral hydrosalpinx, my chances at conception are reduced from about 50% (normal IVF success rates) to about 25-35%.
So, what are we going to do about it? i wish i knew! Right now i think we're going to set up an appointment with an endometriosis expert in Chattanooga, and ask about surgery for the hydrosalpinges, or hysterectomy.
i was on the verge of tears all day. i may not be just "on the verge" for long.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Met Bio!
Alan and i met Bio and her DH last night at a local restaurant. They're as cool in person as they seem online :). She gave me some lovely socks, and i do mean lovely, for my birthday. Yay! i gave her some stitch markers because i knew it would make her happy.
After dinner, they came over and met 2 of the dogs. Unfortunately one of them was sick so we let her hang out upstairs. Poor thing. We played the Wii (especially the Wii Fit) and i think i brought Bio over to the dark side.
What else has been going on? Well, L didn't come home from court on Friday. i can only assume he went back to his family, because i never got called about it. Sheesh! Talk about bad communication!
We got called to come to training all day Saturday on Wednesday or Thursday, i think, so that was not exactly fun but at least we got 2 more classes over with. The morning class was Cultural Awareness, which was with our PATH instructor whom we love. There were some really strange people in class though, including a woman who had an "I LOVE NY" t-shirt and a blue jeans skirt (short) with thigh-high YELLOW tube socks. i thought i dress funny! Mostly we dealt with stereotypes which was pretty lame. Considering the issues we had being approved to foster/adopt non-white kids, i find the class pretty damned ironic.
Then we had (i kid you not) lunchmeat sandwiches. Thankfully we brought PBJ sandwiches or i would have had cold meat on white bread, since i don't eat meat. Yum. ::eyeroll:: We were about the only couple without kids with us, and man were the kids cute!
The afternoon class was pretty good. "Working with the Educational System" with a guy named Per. Like "peer", a common Skandinavian name. He was originally born in Denmark, and since we're accustomed to Great Danes, that worked for us. The biggest problem was that my tum hurt SO BAD all day. i want to know why i'm on birth control, exactly, if i'm still going to have endo pain really bad (it's just as bad as ever now). Sigh. i guess midcycle pain was some better, but not enough to be worth it really.
i wish i could see Sunny today, but there's no way my ute could handle the gravel driveway. i wonder if there are any movies playing...
After dinner, they came over and met 2 of the dogs. Unfortunately one of them was sick so we let her hang out upstairs. Poor thing. We played the Wii (especially the Wii Fit) and i think i brought Bio over to the dark side.
What else has been going on? Well, L didn't come home from court on Friday. i can only assume he went back to his family, because i never got called about it. Sheesh! Talk about bad communication!
We got called to come to training all day Saturday on Wednesday or Thursday, i think, so that was not exactly fun but at least we got 2 more classes over with. The morning class was Cultural Awareness, which was with our PATH instructor whom we love. There were some really strange people in class though, including a woman who had an "I LOVE NY" t-shirt and a blue jeans skirt (short) with thigh-high YELLOW tube socks. i thought i dress funny! Mostly we dealt with stereotypes which was pretty lame. Considering the issues we had being approved to foster/adopt non-white kids, i find the class pretty damned ironic.
Then we had (i kid you not) lunchmeat sandwiches. Thankfully we brought PBJ sandwiches or i would have had cold meat on white bread, since i don't eat meat. Yum. ::eyeroll:: We were about the only couple without kids with us, and man were the kids cute!
The afternoon class was pretty good. "Working with the Educational System" with a guy named Per. Like "peer", a common Skandinavian name. He was originally born in Denmark, and since we're accustomed to Great Danes, that worked for us. The biggest problem was that my tum hurt SO BAD all day. i want to know why i'm on birth control, exactly, if i'm still going to have endo pain really bad (it's just as bad as ever now). Sigh. i guess midcycle pain was some better, but not enough to be worth it really.
i wish i could see Sunny today, but there's no way my ute could handle the gravel driveway. i wonder if there are any movies playing...
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
What a day!
So the last 24 hours have been adventuresome! Got the call about L coming to stay last night, and said yes (obviously). i explained that transportation to school (since they want him to stay in school for the next week until it lets out and his school is 45 minutes in the opposite direction of the 45 minutes i drive to work!) is an issue, and didn't think i could take him. They assured me they'd provide transportation, so we said yes.
Poor kid came with literally just the clothes on his back. Which thankfully is a school uniform so maybe the kids won't notice TOO much, but still... He's also not used to having a bedtime, and was up late playing video games last night, but realizes that's not happening tonight ;). He still doesn't have more clothes, so tomorrow will be day 3 with the same clothes (washed of course). Otherwise he's a good kid, just a typical 12 year old. He has some family members that want custody of him, they just have to work it all out in team meetings and court. So he may end up being a somewhat short-term placement, but you never know how these things will turn out.
So this morning, L went off with a social worker who said she'd bring him back about 5:00 (when i get home from work after leaving at 4:15). Alan and i went to our IVF consult at the Nashville Fertility Clinic at 7:45. And i must say that freaking office is FREEZING!!! Anyway, this is the place we went to a little over a year ago, and the doctor we saw diagnosed me with a nonexistent condition to push us toward IVF before we were ready. After today's c,onsult with another doctor, we're pretty confident that we do NOT want to go there for our treatment. The doctor was fine, but we will probably end up with some procedures done by the quack we saw last year. No bueno. Plus they charged each of us for a consult visit which is nuts, and pushing other tests and treatments that are not probably necessary. Even though they are inexpensive for IVF, they will nickel-and-dime you with the prerequisites. So we are currently looking at other options. The other IVF office in town charges about $5k more than NFC, but it it would be well worth it for the peace of mind of Dr. Dumbass never ever touching me, and not giving another penny to that clinic.
So i get to work about 11 to learn that my pain in the butt coworker has not done something boss man said. He wanted her to leave a report on my desk. My other coworker says she was riffling through stuff on my desk, so she assumed she was doing that, but there was no report. Just riffled through stuff. ::Insert side eye here::
About 1:30 i get a call from L's caseworker's supervisor asking who is picking him up from school. i tell her that i was told that DCS would be doing so tonight and until they can get him in after school care. Then we spend several minutes on different pages about when the end of the school year is (it's NEXT Thursday, not tomorrow, like she kept insisting, saying he had to have summer daycare in place by this Friday). Finally we got *that* part settled, only for her to give me a lecture that we're getting "paid" for these children and that transportation is part of that. It took me saying, "Then you're going to have to find another foster home for him because there's no way i can add an hour and a half commute to my 45 minute commute twice a day for the next week plus, especially if there's no after school care until i get off work" for her to decide that they would take care of the afternoons if i take care of the mornings.
So that's been my last 24 hours. Whew! i threw some spaghetti together for dinner (with salad and garlic bread), and thankfully L said it's his favorite food. So that worked out. He also asked if we can make him a necklace tonight in his school colors. Word! Only real problem so far is he's allergic to dog hair. Uh-oh. Daily vacuuming here we come.
Poor kid came with literally just the clothes on his back. Which thankfully is a school uniform so maybe the kids won't notice TOO much, but still... He's also not used to having a bedtime, and was up late playing video games last night, but realizes that's not happening tonight ;). He still doesn't have more clothes, so tomorrow will be day 3 with the same clothes (washed of course). Otherwise he's a good kid, just a typical 12 year old. He has some family members that want custody of him, they just have to work it all out in team meetings and court. So he may end up being a somewhat short-term placement, but you never know how these things will turn out.
So this morning, L went off with a social worker who said she'd bring him back about 5:00 (when i get home from work after leaving at 4:15). Alan and i went to our IVF consult at the Nashville Fertility Clinic at 7:45. And i must say that freaking office is FREEZING!!! Anyway, this is the place we went to a little over a year ago, and the doctor we saw diagnosed me with a nonexistent condition to push us toward IVF before we were ready. After today's c,onsult with another doctor, we're pretty confident that we do NOT want to go there for our treatment. The doctor was fine, but we will probably end up with some procedures done by the quack we saw last year. No bueno. Plus they charged each of us for a consult visit which is nuts, and pushing other tests and treatments that are not probably necessary. Even though they are inexpensive for IVF, they will nickel-and-dime you with the prerequisites. So we are currently looking at other options. The other IVF office in town charges about $5k more than NFC, but it it would be well worth it for the peace of mind of Dr. Dumbass never ever touching me, and not giving another penny to that clinic.
So i get to work about 11 to learn that my pain in the butt coworker has not done something boss man said. He wanted her to leave a report on my desk. My other coworker says she was riffling through stuff on my desk, so she assumed she was doing that, but there was no report. Just riffled through stuff. ::Insert side eye here::
About 1:30 i get a call from L's caseworker's supervisor asking who is picking him up from school. i tell her that i was told that DCS would be doing so tonight and until they can get him in after school care. Then we spend several minutes on different pages about when the end of the school year is (it's NEXT Thursday, not tomorrow, like she kept insisting, saying he had to have summer daycare in place by this Friday). Finally we got *that* part settled, only for her to give me a lecture that we're getting "paid" for these children and that transportation is part of that. It took me saying, "Then you're going to have to find another foster home for him because there's no way i can add an hour and a half commute to my 45 minute commute twice a day for the next week plus, especially if there's no after school care until i get off work" for her to decide that they would take care of the afternoons if i take care of the mornings.
So that's been my last 24 hours. Whew! i threw some spaghetti together for dinner (with salad and garlic bread), and thankfully L said it's his favorite food. So that worked out. He also asked if we can make him a necklace tonight in his school colors. Word! Only real problem so far is he's allergic to dog hair. Uh-oh. Daily vacuuming here we come.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Drumroll Please
Here is the very first fine silver pendant from the Fred Collection:
It is my interpretation of the shape of S. Korea with the Korean word for "mother" in it. i wanted to make Korea but put the words (in English) "My Heart Is In Korea", but it turns out that 7 g of fine silver clay is really very very tiny. Really it's just about the size of a quarter, all told, so not quite big enough for all those words. i think it turned out pretty well for a first effort though.
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